I am, unfortunately, amazed

I am more and more amazed by God and His providence daily.  Looking at the last two weddings I've been to these last two weeks, both willingly and honestly point to God as the one who brought those couples together.  Last night, I talked to another friend who in week's time went from being the most uncertain person about his future to having the next 2-3 years covered for school and financially secure.  I also found out that someone's words which were meant to do harm to me were confounded and turned instead into my blessing.

Amazing.  I am amazed.

"One of these days the earth will shake;

These iron bars will fall away."

I am amazed, unfortunately.  Should I I ever expect the Father to do otherwise?  He is good and awesome, and He loves to care for us.  He is amazing by our deficiencies; He is faithful because of who He is.

I don't want to lose the wonder, but I long for the day when I am no longer amazed, but just knowingly am exceedingly grateful for who He is and expect, truly, that all things work for those called to His purpose.  He is true to al of His words, sunrise to sunrise.  Because He is.

The way for me is Apnea free!

 Well, after a horrible night's sleep at the Sleep Disorder Center, with electrodes gummed to my head and wires all about my body, it was determined at 5 this morning that I do not have Apnea.  hurray I guess.  I've been saying that all along.  

What this does mean, however, is that there is still no known reason as to why my heart does its jittery thing.  I'm kind of under the impression that maybe its my thing.  Some people can jump high, some naturally smell good, I have a heart jittery thingy.  And yours doesn't.  And thats just your too bad.

I did come home this morning to a great e-mail from Brent with a link to "Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog", which was a web based musical with Neil Patrick Harris.  I know what you're thinking... "Hey, Warwick, maybe you have a musical thingy as well as a heart thingy"... and I would say, "Yes, that may be true", however, this is clever.  Very clever.  A little too clever.  If you would like to watch it, and I think you do, go here:

http://www.hulu.com/watch/28343/dr-horribles-sing-along-blog

wars all around

1 Kings 5 starts....

1 When Hiram king of Tyre heard that Solomon had been anointed king to succeed his father David, he sent his envoys to Solomon, because he had always been on friendly terms with David.2 Solomon sent back this message to Hiram:

 3 "You know that because of the wars waged against my father David from all sides, he could not build a temple for the Name of the LORD his God until the LORD put his enemies under his feet. 4But now the LORD my God has given me rest on every side, and there is no adversary or disaster. 5 I intend, therefore, to build a temple for the Name of the LORD my God, as the LORD told my father David, when he said, 'Your son whom I will put on the throne in your place will build the temple for my Name.'

 6 "So give orders that cedars of Lebanon be cut for me. My men will work with yours, and I will pay you for your men whatever wages you set. You know that we have no one so skilled in felling timber as the Sidonians."

 7 When Hiram heard Solomon's message, he was greatly pleased and said, "Praise be to the LORD today, for he has given David a wise son to rule over this great nation."

What peace am I lacking in order to follow the desires God has for me?  How much time do I spend battling death and all his friends instead of living in the freedom of Christ that I can not serve God as I would, or as I could?

Father, help me to discern and take action.  

Mercy and Kindness

"Let us fall into the hand of the Lord, for his mercy is great; 

but let me not fall into the hand of man."

-2 Samuel 24:24

To have and to practice the forgiveness of God, to be able to display such mercy against those who have wronged me, what a better witness to the changed life under the Lordship of Christ can there be?  It is so against out nature to forgive, and it is perhaps so against out culture which hides under the auspices of a forgetful mind, allowing everything to just pass over as if it is not a big deal.  Or sometimes making the most of such a situation by lording it over how much we've been wronged or how much wrong we've forgotten?  

Help me, Father, to be the living example You need, no matter how counter the world it may make me.  Your love endures forever and Your grace knows no end!  Help me to show Your people what this means, and demonstrate to others so they may see Your glory!  Teach me to be forgiving, as You forgive, as You have forgiven me so much.

Ch ch ch ch changes!

I'm really not sure when I met Emily.  I know that I met her through my sister, Kyleigh.  I know that when we were together we had a good time.  I really started to hang out with her when we were both at HACC.  I really got to know her when I started my Bible Study... we actually met for the first time on her birthday!  Kyleigh and Debbie made this ridiculous cake with a bear on it... we met at Denny's, the one that doesn't exist anymore in Union Deposit.  

I started the Bible Study because I knew that I needed to surround myself with other Christians, I needed a community to grow in... I think for all of us it was what we needed.  When others stopped coming, or their interests changed or fell away, Emily was always a constant.  I could always count on her solid insights, and well, all the heart that she brought to the study.  

We were together weekly for quite a while... almost 5 years!  incredible when you think about it.  When Heather ended up living with her and another friend at Millersville I saw her even more.  

And then she left for bigger things and more schooling in St. Louis, MO.  Weird.  Someone that I could always count on was miles away.  Half a continent away.  Forever away.  And then she started seeing this guy, and now they've gotten married... so I guess she'll stay forever away in St. Louis.  A good thing, no doubt.

More so, I can not help but think that God had provided us for each other, all of us, for a season.  And He knows best, and He knows summers, falls, winters, and springs.  It was such a great thing for Heather and I to go out and to see her on the day we all prayed for and about for so long.  God has brought her a husband that will help her and be the man she so longed for in her life.  And we were there to see him, his family, and all of their friends.  

What a blessing to be a witness to all of this, to see where God has brought all of us through and into.  How much our lives have changed since that first meeting at Denny's!  How much He has blessed us because of our commitment to seek Him, to love Him, and to follow Him no matter where He leads!  

'Cause who knows where that will be?  Harrisburg, St. Louis, and beyond!

stinky shepherd boys as unexpected warriors

With all my stuff, all my assurances, all my safety and protection, could I do with less?  If I'm Saul, King of Israel, would I trust a stinky shepherd boy to defeat a seasoned warrior?

When cucumbers attack!

This year, besides spending mucho time on the lawn and garden around the house, I decided it was time to plant a vegetable garden.  There was a great plot right next to the deck and, well, I got to work.  So, I cleared some ground, fixed up the already present garden box, chased away a snake, and planted.  I was careful not to plant too much, the plot is not that big... I planted three kinds of tomato, green peppers, red peppers, Pablo Anchos (a hot pepper that my mum had bought accidentally so I took it off her hands), pepperocinis, basil, mint, parsley, corn, eggplant, and cucumber (for pickles).

Well, the first two weeks went by and all was well... and then the rains came.  My garden has become overflowing... literally.  There are leaves and flowers hanging out all over the place.  The mint, parsely, and basil have taken over the east side, the tomatoes are out of control, and cucumbers... well, let's say the cucumbers are everywhere, everywhere!  I've got cucumbers coming out all over!  I thought at first the cukes were just overzealous tomatoes, but no... the cucumbers are out of control.  They are everywhere.  

Every time I head outside to look at what I've done to the yard, I'm surprised at all that has occurred.  Plants are still coming out to bloom, and my veggie plot is busting out all over.  I put a lot of hard work into the ground and soil, and I still weed, pulling out the unwanted and trimming for health those I want to stick around.  

The care that goes into these plants that probably will not come back.  But I do what I can to those plants to make that their time here is productive and they can do all that they can while they are here.  

I'm still surprised at how I sometimes miss the forest for the trees.  I only pay attention to the pruning and not the over abundance of fruit... or the over abundance of fruit and not the one who prunes and toils the soil.  If I'm gonna be the most that I can be, I need to focus on the Maker, the Carer, the Tiller, and trust that He is doing all that He can do to make my time here that most abundant life for His glory.

The depths are unquenchable

"Deep calls unto deep

in the roar of your waterfalls;

all your waves and breakers

have swept over me."

~Psalm 42:7

What a beautiful image.  I wonder if David was sitting by a waterfall when he wrote this.  I wonder if while we was thinking about his position a deer came up to drink from the pool as he sat there motionless inspiring the first line.  Could he see Hermon and Mt Mizar from where he was?  

The limitless and awesome glory of God being poured down, a testament to His name and witness to His power.  Is this what David sees as he hears that sound of falling, rushing water? Into a pool on earth.  A pool that never seems satisfied, but constantly is just drinking deep the deluge from above.  As quickly as the pool takes in this splendor, it empties itself ready to take in more.  Never satisfied, always craving more.

My heart is the same.  I am never satisfied but long for more of You, Father.  In many ways the doubts and the wonder need the same thing, more of Your power, more of Your constant provision.  I can only do so much, but am forced just to sit there and take in this flow, this barrage from above.  Knowing that if I move away from here, out from under You, I will dry up.